I don’t know how to wish I was dead when people treat me as if I already am.
I don’t want to die, I just don’t want to live like this. I want to not exist, or disappear even if it’s to get away from everything that seems to follow me everywhere. I want someone to count on, and someone to have faith in. It seems there’s not a lot to have faith in any more even if it’s just yourself. Yes you can go to any shrink possible but I don’t want to pay someone to listen. I just need someone to hear me and know it’s real. For the first time in a long time, this pain is real.